Sometimes when I am restless and dissatisfied, I delete things about myself, or things I have created. I erase pictures, delete posts on blogs, and dismember my past.
And sometimes, like today, I just hold myself to a higher standard, and edit what I, in the past, have included in haste to have more to show and offer. The editing of what I choose to present seems like it should come naturally to me, with my methods of photography, but it doesn’t.
I don’t know if it’s common for other photographers to have similar methods, but I will do anything to capture something I find fascinating or worth capturing. In the past, I’ve requested that cars be pulled to the side of the road, climbed on things, and abruptly gone from walking to on my knees or stomach. On one occasion, I was on my back in the middle of a busy city sidewalk to try to photograph a building (those didn’t turn out, unfortunately). I was extremely lucky to have been living in upstate New York in the country with my obliging grandparents when I got my first (and only) camera.
When I am trying to photograph something, I am very stubborn and will take up to 200 pictures trying to get it (if I’m not with someone— if I am, I limit myself to around 50). Even then, I am only sometimes successful.
Anyhow, I have gone through my blog, and edited out the photographs I found lacking artistry or intellection. I was fond of everything that had been here before, but not all of the photographs…matched what I felt to be photography. They were just nice pictures. And, I suppose, occasionally, like with The Death of the Giant Balloon and The Spider and the Fly, I will post the photographs not because of the quality of the photograph, but because of the serendipity of the moment, the preciseness of the timing. And others, I post because of the colors more than anything, like these two. Maybe because I’m synesthetic, and color is very important to me, photographs in which I am fortunate enough to capture the colors I see become special to me.
Anyway, I’m holding myself to a higher standard, and trying to challenge myself lately by taking pictures of things I would never think to photograph, like food (even though I love food, I’ve never been drawn to take a picture of it). I have unpacked most of my boxes, but, still no camera cord. I may just buy a USB/memory stick adapter…I can be very impatient with things like this. Anyhow, I haven’t stopped taking pictures. There’s just still a complication with the camera to computer bit.
(title, btw is lifted from a Regina Spektor song)